The Not-So-Queen of the Ball

Published July 31, 2011 by missharleyquinn

Sometimes I actually listen to myself talk and wonder why I haven’t hired someone to be on call 24/7 to bitch slap me when I bring up the following:

~ Sewing magic Mormon underwear for the Smithsonian, which should technically be referred to as Temple Undergarments. Who even brings this sort of thing up? Even if they did do it, it’s like making authentic Kotex belts from 1921 and bragging about it!

~ How exciting it would be to make costumes for an entire cast of men in “Romeo and Juliet” and thinking the glazed look in everyone’s eyes means their dreaming about it too.

~ Realizing it’s almost the 3 year anniversary of my quitting smoking, 2 year remembrance of my sweet Apple passing away, and my 1 year anniversary of “embracing” celibacy and that they all happened on the same day, August 2. This is also the day the government may default on its debt, which seems like the perfect segue of introducing the prior 3 facts into conversation.

~ I’ve been on this planet approximately 1,261,440,000 seconds and I just learned I should have been shaving the back of my legs, not just the front.  I had no idea! My line of logic being that I shave my arm pits not the tops of my shoulders.

8 comments on “The Not-So-Queen of the Ball

  • Oh..
    August 2cnd, a day for sure, wonder what the cosmic significance is?
    I like your leg shaving logic, now share with me please what the logic of shaving legs is? No one has ever been able to convince me of it’s merit, therefore I do not.
    I fantasies about making dolls for the entire cast of Moulin rouge , and get the same feeling when I tell people.. must be them…

    • I shave due to my fear of fire started by friction, my leg hair is very dense…it stands on end like a 1950’s crew cut…I also have a minor concern of poking people like a porcupine might…although that could be fun…if mine were soft or lush I’d no doubt keep it and let people braid it for a quarter a pop. 😉

  • LOL OK, the comments you two left are almost as funny as the post.

    Congrats on the quitting smoking. I quit smoking cigarettes 3 years ago too. I have not, however, quit smoking altogether. LOL 😉

    And while you two ladies are focused on the hair shaving, I’m totally bug eyed about the celibacy thing! 8-| I’m sure there’s a story in here, that I’ve missed.

    Do you say “Congratulations!” to a thing like that???? xoxo

    • Up until last year, I was much like a koala…partaking of the flesh-y joys but once a year…rest assured I don’t smell as eucalytus-ish as a koala, which may be the problem. Do boys only like girls that smell like Vicks???…I would love to say my celibacy is for religious reasons or to help me on a spiritual path…but t’ain’t so…my hubby just isn’t that into me. *lol* Oh there’s a 1,000 and 1 reasons he offers…offers like a bad host hands a can of spam to his dinner guests…stress…my ass is way too large…he has a raid for trolls…he’s tired…it’s never me, but he just caaaan’t ;)…which of course begs the question why do I shave my legs????

      You are officially put on notice that you have unwittingly been a part of and celebrated TMI Monday. 🙂

  • Okay, TMI monday is now my favorite place to be..
    You might however get the gift wrapped can of Heavenly spam, thats…OMG 30 years old…
    Raid for trolls? Are we talking something that lurks on the internet and leaves nasty comments? or a bigger problem hiding under your bridges in TN?
    Come over to the dark side and stop buying razors!I have seen your cute face, and it’s his loss…If you ever decide to switch teams, I could hook you up with a cute chick I know…
    Ok, thats my TMI
    and time to go!

    • Trolls are what I think he hunts/chases/dates or something on World of Warcraft…Switch teams??? Girl, I can’t even get to the field! ~lol~

      Trust me, I’m like one of those Japanese pinch hitters, I’ll play for whatever team gives me play time. 😉

      Seriously though, my ideal is either Liam Neeson or Queen Latifah…so you can see it’s a wide and gorgeous field I dream of. 🙂 And it is his loss, ain’t no way I’m making a dress for him to play the Juliet now…no way, no how. `l~

      Maybe we should start TMI Mondays 4 our blogs…there’s just so many places we could go to after the jump off point of leg hair and celibacy.

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